


you could upgrade...

by halftheway



Category: The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: Adultery, Prompt Fill, forgive me i am very rusty at tags on here i haven't posted anything since 2016, i dont think this has anything i really need to tag? hm, though that's more. implied/referenced than explicit?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-23 14:10:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18152873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halftheway/pseuds/halftheway
Summary: written to fill a prompt on tumblr: ted & "don't look for redeeming qualities, i don't have any."





	you could upgrade...

**Author's Note:**

> this turned out... way more charlotte-centric than the original anon probably wanted but u know what? i ran with it. in my head this takes place... at a bar, maybe, or at like an office christmas party..... i dont even know

“So where’s your husband?” Ted asks, leering down at her.

“O-Oh, Sam? He’s… He’s down at the precinct,” Charlotte says, mustering a half-hearted smile. It's technically the truth, or at least it's what she chooses to believe.

“The precinct, huh?” he says, snorting.

He raises an eyebrow at her as she protests, “He’s working late. He’s real close to a breakthrough in his case-”

Ted gives her a look. “Oh, come on.”

“You’re right.” Her fingers twitch at her side, looking for a cigarette, but she'd made herself leave the pack at home. “I’m not sure _what _he’s been up to, he’s been comin’ home so late most nights.”__

__“Eh, fuck Sam,” he says. He glances around the room before looking back at her and asking, “You think he cares where you are?”_ _

__“I’m sure he does!” She’s not. Something in her is curled around the secret of her failing marriage, desperate to keep it between herself and Sam, but it's painfully apparent to anyone that asks. Things haven’t been alright between her and Sam, not for awhile. She can’t even remember the last time they-_ _

__“You honestly think he gives a shit? Charlotte, open your eyes. He doesn’t care about you.”_ _

__She sighs. It should hurt to hear those words, but the truth is she accepted them a long while ago. “We can make things work, I know it. I just…”_ _

__“What?”_ _

__“Nothing, it’s nothing.”_ _

__He just stares at her with an impatient expression on his face._ _

__“I want… more, sometimes,” she admits. Hanging her head, she continues, “I love Sam, but he’s not- Sometimes I feel like we rushed things, and now that spark’s gone…”_ _

__“Whoa, hey, I’m not your therapist,” Ted says quickly._ _

__Charlotte rolls her eyes. “I know.”_ _

__“But it sounds to me like you should take a page from your husband’s book.”_ _

__She looks up at him, startled. “Wh-What do you mean?”_ _

__Ted shrugs, eyeing her. “He’s obviously got something going on on the side, why shouldn't you do the same?”_ _

__“I-” She’d be lying if she said she hadn’t thought about it. She has. A lot. But to have someone confront her with the concept, to speak it into existence like this… She can't deny how appealing it sounds. “I wouldn't even know where to start.”_ _

__He shrugs again and spreads his hands. “Hey, if you’re lookin’.”_ _

__“Ted!”_ _

__“I’m just saying, you wanna get back at Sam, I’m all for it.”_ _

__She’s quiet for awhile, torn between wanting to defend her marriage and being tired of being pushed aside for so long._ _

__“So?”_ _

__The sound of Ted’s voice shakes her from her thoughts. “Okay.”_ _

__“Alright. Just don’t go looking for any redeeming qualities, Charlotte,” he says. She watches him tip back the last of his drink. “I don’t have any.”_ _

__“Well, well- Ted, I’m sure that’s not true,” she stammers. She reaches out to touch his arm but stops halfway, not sure if she should. Instead she settles for tugging nervously at the hem of her sweater._ _

__“Look, with me, what you see is what you get, okay? Take it or leave it.” He turns to face her finally, and she stares into his eyes._ _

__“I’ll take it,” she says softly._ _

**Author's Note:**

> i am trying so hard to put action in between lines of dialogue i promise
> 
> also i still can't figure out how to add a mf link to this but follow me on tumblr same username as here


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